I'm not creative.
Oh but you are - and your future may be riding on your ability to rediscover and use your creativity. And I guess it's time to uncover the Dip-Wad Club.
“The creative adult is the child who survived.”
— Ursula Le Guin
“Well, if he’s a car-man, what are you into? What kind of lady are you?”
That was my pick-up line for the woman sitting beside me at the sports bar where a mutual friend’s birthday brought us all together. Her husband was talking to our friend’s husband about sports cars and I (truly) tried to engage in this foursome but it wasn’t working; I know nothing about sports cars.
I noticed she had been staring off to the TVs nearby, and something told me she wasn’t much of a car gal, or basketball fan.
Adamantly, she shook her head no when I first asked if she, too, was a car person, and that’s when I used my pick-up line, hoping for some meaningful engagement. Her reply to, ‘What kind of lady are you?’: “A boring one.”
With a furrowed brow, I tilted my head to challenge her response and she added, “Well, I guess I like to read books.”
And so began our conversation, not about cars, not about books, but about potential untapped passions. I shared that I’m an artist and asked if she enjoys creating. “Oh no! I don’t have a creative bone in my body, although my mother would tell you otherwise.”
“Why is that?” I asked.
“Well I don’t do anything creative.”
“Anything, really? Well, did you ever?”
“Yeah, when I was a little girl, I used to paint all the time. I loved painting.”
“I’m not creative.” Oh, but you are.
As soon as I hear those words, I’m not creative, in any way, shape or form (because it comes out in all of them), it always feels as if some alarm goes off inside of me and I’m suddenly on a mission to gently prove otherwise.
The fact is, creativity is a part of our DNA as image-bearers of God, the ultimate artist as 'Creator of All Things. It’s an undeniable part of who we are.
“For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that people are without excuse.” - Romans 1:20
As a Christian artist, I’ve marked up my fair share of books whose authors attempt to shed light on this truth to help readers believe, and then receive it. If this is a new idea for you, I’ll share some of those resources below in a recommended book list, but for those who’ve read the books, you know a common takeaway is:
we are born creative, but it’s up to us to find and use our creativity,
and specifically for the Kingdom work God needs us to do. As each of us is given a gift, we should use it for his glory1.
So, back to the conversation with my new friend...
You know when a message begins to resonate with you, and then it’s everywhere you go, presented by different people in different places, and you realize you should be paying attention?
Yeah, that wasn’t this moment.
It’s hard to embrace an idea as abstract as ‘rediscover that little girl and her creativity inside of you’ when it means nothing to you. I bet she was thinking, ‘What could that really do? What’s in it for me?’ She already believed she didn’t have a creative bone in her body and I doubt a stranger new friend in a bar could present some Oprah-head-spinning life-changing idea that would change her mind.
But then I shared my story.
I shared how my creativity came back to me after decades of suppressing it, and how the timing was perfect because it happened right before my world was rocked with the first (and still haven’t seen the last) comings of our family trauma. How God used creativity as a way for me to find hope, therapeutic help and a release, connect with Him and the Holy Spirit, find community, and ultimately, heal. And one day, I realized I needed to create. It was no longer for fun, it was for life. It was for every aspect of my well-being - physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.
I also believe part of God’s plan was/is for me to share this experience with others. God led me to my creativity, which led me to my art ministry work.
Nobody knew more than Jesus that facts tell, but stories sell. And not BEFORE my creativity re-awakened, but DURING, did our family’s trauma occur. Creativity was my sustaining grace, thank you, Jesus. I know first-hand that leaning into my creativity and thus, my faith through my creativity, helped me through some of the hardest days and nights.
Like David writing poetry out of the depths of the darkness surrounding his life, I painted, I wrote, I made seeking beauty my mission right through the darkness in my life. And it sustained me.
I found brush strokes spoke words and emotions I couldn’t speak and helped me to process things I couldn’t outside of the canvas or art journal. It became an unchartered path to connecting with God and when I had no words to pray, I could paint and feel close and connected to and seen by my Creator.
Eventually, I would share what I learned with others through my art ministry. God reawakening my creativity healed me, and is now helping other women heal, too. I am in awe at his goodness and grace with how it has all unfolded.
Additionally, I have discovered that my creativity has given me a place to tell the stories I cannot yet speak. I may never be able to speak some of the stories my body is holding, but at least they can be released through my art and not wreak havoc on me mentally, physically, and emotionally by holding them inside2.
If the body keeps the score, our art doesn’t have to. - me
According to psychiatrists, one of the reasons they give journals away or recommend them for their clients is because of the importance of this release: getting what we are holding inside our minds, outside of our minds, somewhere, anywhere (healthy).
So, if you are asking yourself, what’s in it for me - to take the time to rediscover the child inside me, to rediscover old passions and stir my creativity?
Oh everything, friend.
Absolutely everything!
* My new friend at the bar inspired my collage, “She Found Her Wings” (above). I hope one day I’ll have the opportunity to share it with her and perhaps then, she can share how she, in deed has, found her wings.
Important disclosure:
I realize revisiting your younger or inner child may not be healing or a safe place for you without the guidance of a mental health professional, which I am not. Only you, or your therapist, can know if this is a safe and appropriate exercise. Please use your judgment here, and know that reaching out for a therapist’s help is often a very appropriate, wise, and smart decision to make for yourself. If you need help finding a mental health professional, call your insurance company and they can help you find someone who is covered by your insurance and even make the calls to see if therapists are available and taking new clients. Additionally, The National Alliance for Mental Health has great resources, including a database to help you search for a mental health professional.
You have permission
In case you need it, I hereby grant you permission to play and rediscover your inner child. You don’t have to go out and purchase a canvas and paints; start small.
And if you need a little help getting started, I created a super fun little zine chock-full of invitations to play in “The Playbook by KBP”. They are available for sale on Etsy (oh boy, still a major work in progress for me).
In my coming posts for paid subscribers only, I will share ways you can reconnect with your creativity by starting small, especially THROUGH the hard/trauma. I’ll share what helped me, and info about upcoming workshops I’ll be offering to help with this.
Additionally, I am excited to begin my certification to become a therapeutic arts practitioner and cannot wait to share what I’m learning with you here and through my ministry work. I look forward to building a healthy, thriving creative community.
Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day’s out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ’s law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived.
Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life. - Galatians 6:1-5 MSG
Hall Ball, Girl Games, the Dip-Wad Club and the many Yearbooks
I’m chuckling while typing this because I never imagined I’d share ‘the Dip-Wad club’ with anyone. The Dip-Wad club attendees would bring some of type of dip (whatever we could find in our fridges) and we’d all gather to dip crackers and chips into the dips and mix them to create our own. It was one of the many clubs I created as a way to entertain my friends in our neighborhood in small-town Salem, VA. I believe we only had four gatherings before it dissolved. We probably ran out of dips.
In addition to creating and organizing clubs, my brother and I created games, including ‘Hall Ball’, a variation of dodge ball where we’d score various points for creative ways (ie, a hit that came from a bounce off the hall closet door) to hit our opponent as they tried to get from one end of the hall to the other. We created an instruction booklet with rules, photos, and everything.
Then, there was Girl Game, which, to my surprise and delight, surfaced after Mom went through some old boxes. I was about 8 or 9 when my brother and I created this variation of ‘Go Fish’ with girls of our time.
My favorite had to be all of the yearbooks I drew. I’d staple the pages together and each page had 15-20 thumbnails of kids school portraits, five in a row, with the names stacked out to the side. I loved making different faces, hairstyles, names, and at the bottom of the individual photos, I’d include a class photo, everyone standing together, with the teacher. They were done in pencil only and very detailed. I treasured these yearbooks.
Lately, I have been enjoying collage art. But it’s been on my mind to sketch a yearbook page, the way I used to.
You ARE creative! Come count the ways…
If visual art, writing poetry or song lyrics, being a MacGyver, or creating games isn’t your thing, I’d like to encourage you to discover how you ARE, in fact, creative, so you can stop yourself next time you feel a NO arise from within when someone asks if you are creative.
Read through these and see if any strike a chord…
Do you enjoy creating recipes or are you skilled at ‘making something out of nothing’ with random ingredients?
Are you good at making Excel spreadsheets to organize information?
Do you sing your own ‘remix’ versions of your favorite songs? It’s OK if they are B-side.
Do you coach a sport and create practice drills, line-ups, or personalized plans for helping a player improve?
Do you write curriculum for or teach a student and meet them where they are?
Do you speak in different voices for the various characters when reading aloud to your kiddo?
Do you notice beauty and capture it in a photograph?
Do you take back routes and avoid the main roads to get around town?
Do you plan gardens, plan vacations, plan your bedroom layout?
Do you decorate for anything?
Do you write proposals or make business deals happen?
Can you train a pet?
Are you a parent? Everything you do involves creativity.
Do you see shapes and creatures in the clouds?
Can you put together an outfit?
Can you set a table?
Do you play a sport?
I could go on, but the point is, creativity isn’t reserved for the artist. We are all creative. Think about some of the ways you are now and then, think of some of the things you did as a child. Give yourself permission to play again, just like she/he did.
You may rediscover an old passion.
You may rediscover yourself.
You may connect with the Lord in a way you didn’t know you could.
You may find real help.
You may begin to heal.
“Our dreams and creativity can rewrite the narratives of our future.” - Mari Copeny
Books, books, and more books!
I love books that tackle the Art/Creativity + Faith topic and here are a few I can personally recommend, and a couple on my ‘to read’ list. These books are linked to my Amazon Affiliate page For Becoming. If you are considering purchasing any of them, I’d love if you’d do it through my link. I receive a small commission which goes right back into art supplies.
The Artist’s Rule by Christine Valters Paintner (one of my favorites)
Unlocking the Heart of the Artist by Matt Tommey (great to read in creative community)
And on my ‘to read’ list:
Imagine: A Vision for Christians in the Arts by Steve Turner
Art for God's Sake: A Call to Recover the Arts by Philip Graham Ryken
Final Thoughts
Friends, We are masterfully designed by a Creator who gave us the gift of creativity. The best way we can honor that gift is to give it back to him by finding and using our creativity in ways that bring him glory.
I hope you will do this for yourself. Your future may be riding on it.
Will 2025 be the year you finally set your creativity free? I pray it will be.
Join me here in the new year. I’ll be sharing what I’m learning and you won’t want to miss it. Please invite your friends, too, because we heal in creative community!
xo,
Kelly
“As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.” - 1 Peter 4:10
This is a reference to The Body Keeps the Score
I have the same reaction when someone says they're not creative... Yes yes you are? Let's count the ways!
What a beautiful essay Kelly. I love how your encouraging people to tap into their God-given creativity 💛