The Art of Decay
and the process of unbecoming
“…hold on to what is good, reject every kind of evil. May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:21b-24
The wilted petals, edges furling inward and outward and brownness eating away the pink, causing a most delicate wrinkling to expose the veins of what once was the pleasing life and fragrant beauty of the rose, are the outmost part of the decaying process, the ones we can see. On the inside, decay is at work, with transformation happening within the plant’s cells. With all that is happening, both inwardly and outwardly, it’s fair to say this rose is having an experience.
It’s an art, really; this middle space between what once was and what will inevitably be – this process taking place of transformation, destruction, dying. The art of decay.
Life. Decay. Death.
Like the rose, who, during its decaying process, drops its petals to the ground to expose its resting seeds who are waiting for their turn to do their work, we, too, experience this process of transformation and destruction, dropping the parts of our lives that are no longer serving us; parts that had their season, perhaps they served us at one point, and now it’s time for them to go. Decay serves a purpose.
And again, like the rose, when its seeds drop and enter the earth’s soil, the process of life begins all over again. We, too, experience new life from the seeds that had been waiting (bursting) for us to plant so they could grow new life in us; seeds that needed us to go through a decaying process of some sort before they could be exposed before dropping in the first place. Decay is necessary.
Thus, there is beauty to be found in the decay.
I write a lot about ‘becoming’ – the always evolving, never-ending process of becoming the person we were created to be when God first designed us in our mothers’ wombs. It’s a life-long endeavor to ‘become’. And there is absolute beauty in our ‘becomings’.
But with the art of decay, and the emphasis on the beauty of it, I am reminded of a quote I love by Paul Coelho,
“Maybe the journey isn’t so much about becoming anything. Maybe it’s about unbecoming everything that isn’t really you so you can be what you were meant to be in the first place.”
This rose, in the middle of its decaying process, is simply beautiful to me and dropping our decaying parts is a beautiful thing, too.
However, often our decay doesn’t feel pretty. As work is taking place on the inside, and work is taking place on the outside, this experience / this process of dropping off the dead parts that no longer serve us, may be among the hardest things we ever have to do.
We may not want to get rid of them (yet).
We may not even know what they are.
We may have held on to them for so long, they feel comfortable and like they are a permanent part of us. That’s me.
I have struggled for a long time with discontentment about our family’s circumstances; that we live daily in turmoil, surrounded by stress, CPTSD, and hard, HARD things with our children from their medical diagnoses and our exposure to toxic mold. I struggle so badly, wishing and praying for better days, for better circumstances. I have good days and great days, but the hard days are SO HARD and it’s easy for me to allow that comfortable, familiar discontentment to wrap me up again and again. I’ve written about this before. I’m trying hard to address it, through therapy, prayer, tools, and a lot of Jesus.
And thankfully, we can take heart! Because of his unfailing love and unending grace, our wonderful, masterful Creator - who, while we were in our mother’s womb, planted in us these seeds waiting to come forth, waiting to burst open…these desires of our heart1 - cares and loves us so deeply and wants to see us become this better version of ourselves. He will help us. He delights in every detail of our lives.2 I do think it’s important to add, and I speak from experience here, he may not reveal to you what you need to drop or what needs to die until he believes you are truly ready to get rid of it. We can also trust in his timing.
“He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.” – John 15:2
The art of decay is the process of letting go, releasing all that doesn’t belong, all that doesn’t serve you anymore, so that you can be the best version God the Creator designed you to be. And that, my friends, is a beautiful thing. I am so grateful we don’t do it alone. The One who designed our best versions, will see to it that we become them.
“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.” - Philippians 1:6
Questions to ponder/journal:
What seeds are bursting inside of you, waiting to drop and be planted? OR,
Do you have a yearning, a whispering, a Holy Spirit nudging, that is trying to come out of you but in order for you to more clearly hear and see it, you need to allow something to decay (ie, fear, anger, guilt, a habit, negative thinking)?
What do you need to do to allow the decaying process to take place? OR,
What do you need to do to allow the planting and growing process to take place?
What part/s of your life do you need to unbecome so that God’s version of you can finally have a chance to shine?
What do you have to lose in this unbecoming? What do you have to gain?
If you are confused about the desires of your heart, have you asked the Lord lately what those are?
“Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.: - Psalm 37:4
“The LORD directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will never fall, for the LORD holds them by the hand.” - Psalms 37:23-24
“And thankfully, we can take heart! Because of his unfailing love and unending grace..” I loved this, so much, Kelly- you’ve given me something to really ponder today and I’m so grateful. 🙏🏻💗